In comments, LarryArnold adds this gem:
One thing I haven’t seen from you is taking seriously “that feeling.” (Pit of your stomach, hair on the back of your neck, wherever yours shows up.) Working with survivors of sexual assault and other violence there’s one thing I heard over and over: “I had a feeeling something was wrong, but I ignored it/thought I was being paranoid/didn’t want to be embarrased*.”A-freakin'-men. Fuck embarrassment. Don't overreact (pulling your gun because someone jostled you at the milk cooler is a Bad Thing), but start making plans and moving towards an exit.
Whenever “that feeling” shows up, get thee to Condition Orange!
If you haven't read The Gift of Fear
, do so. (Link goes to Amazon.) It's $9, and it's got plenty of good advice.I think most of the gunbloggers have posted up their own stories of things. Mine was a highway rest stop, Jay's (one of many) was a guy tailing several of them at NRA '11 (until he saw four open-carried pistols in .357 and/or .45), Caleb has drawn-down on a guy... the list goes on.
3 comments:
Excellent book and one of the main things I teach my children. Anytime my kids say, something doesn't feel right, we give it validity. We listen and we build on that.
This book, and the follow-up, Protecting the Gift, were incredible tools for me when I trained as an instructor for RAD. I go back to them regularly for refreshers and to accurately quote when needed.
As a survivor, I wish I had listened to my gut feeling many moons ago instead of listening to the "What would my Nana say?" thoughts. I was raised to be courteous, polite, and deferential, because that's how a young lady was supposed to act.
These days, my thoughts when I get that gut feeling? "Locate your exits; look them in the eye; create space, etc." Having a plan helps quiet the anxiety and lets me be mindful of my situation. Assertiveness may be interpreted as b*tchiness, but it's a damned sight better than becoming a victim. I don't use the word 'never' lightly, but in this case, NEVER again.
Look forward to reading Kathy's post later (*&%$# work-filter)! IMHO, you cannot ever have enough resources to help you out when you want to keep awareness of your surroundings / situation.
Yep, much better the hunch and action that the Aw s**t moment...
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